Band question, need comments/help...

[BenoA]

Hello everyone,

Got a question for you, how do you deal the gigging thing with your band?

I've been with my RATM tribute band for about 2 years. And I've known some of the members for at least 6 years.

I'm the only one with a family (3 kidz and wife), a house and a full time demanding job. Since day one I always told them that gigging was not a priority for me but once in a while I would not mind as long as it is not too far from home (1 hour drive is OK) and that we get some money for it.

Again yesterday, I got an email from one of the members, he had a gig for us at the end of December, almost 3 hours of driving (just to go there) from my place. The other day, I had said "no" to another gig that would have required a 2 hours of driving.

You know what is funny, I bet my wife would let me go to those gigs but, it's not a matter of family restrictions, it's mostly a personnal thing, I don't feel like driving 3 hours to play a 2 hours gig, carrying all my rig and getting cheap money, would have been fun when I was younger but right now, nope. These days, I play music to have fun. I enjoy playing in front of a crowd but why would I need to drive so much to be able to play live with my band? And damn, the Montreal area is so huge, I can't understand why we can't find a place here, I live in the Montreal area and there is plenty of clubs/bars here.

It makes me feel guilty as I feel like the guy who always say "NO" to my band mates. Many times I offered them to get another guitar player, really, I would not mind, and it would help them gig as much as they want but they told me they want to keep me in the band.

What do you think? Should I simply quit?

[jgcable]

I'm with you bro. Gigging is only cool for a few reasons:

If you are making big bucks
If you are looking to get laid.

If the answer is no to both of those statements then gigging sucks.
Simple as that.

[lerxstcat]

Looks like they are trying to keep you, yet pressure you to play outside the parameters you've laid out. Just tell them that you're not going to change your mind, and they're nopt going to slip one past you. Then say that if they keep doing that then you feel you HAVE to quit, so they can get a guy that will do what they want.

They should either chill out, or let you quit. But be prepared for the sucky possibility that they'll say "Oh no, we want to keep you" and THEN can you the second they do find another guy. They won't let you go until they know they have you replaced. Don't take it personally when they do that, it's pretty common.

Maybe it's time for a home studio and a recording project instead of this band. Sounds like you have different priorities than the rest of them, and it might be better to make the parting while it can still be amicable.

[stevieb91]

Six hours of travel for a two hour gig? Is it going to pay enough to even cover the gas?

[Inazone]

Not being in a tribute band, maybe there are factors I'm not aware of, but it seems to me that a RATM tribute band would be the type that is going to get offered very specific gigs, unless you're in an area where there is an ongoing demand for RATM songs. If I'm wrong about that, you can disregard the rest of my reply. But if that is the case, and gig opportunities are pretty limited, I would advise that you either leave the band or "suck it up" and play an out-of-town gig every now and then. Unless the phone is ringing off the hook for local shows, driving a couple of hours to play is the only way to keep the band out in front of people, whether its an audience or promoters.

In a situation like mine, being in an original band trying to "break out" of a limited local market, there's no avoiding the long drives to play short sets. We have driven two hours each way, played for 40 minutes, and not made enough to cover gas...but it's becoming a necessary evil if we want to spread our name around outside of our immediate area. However, in the case of a tribute band, I would suspect that it's more a matter of promoters coming to you. That would seem like a good thing, but you probably don't have much in the way of merchandise to supplement your gig money. Again, maybe I'm wrong, but if you strictly play RATM covers, I don't know what demand there would be for CDs or shirts.

If the above is true, maybe it's time to make your exit. You're never going to be happy with the gigging situation, and a tribute band HAS to go where the gigs are, meaning that your bandmates presumably won't be happy having to turn down opportunities.

[BenoA]

Thanks guys for all the good replies! Now, I have some "thinking" to do on my side.