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  • hell

    heh... this was sent to me, thought i'd share:

    The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term. The answer by one student was "so profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well.

    Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic(absorbs heat)?


    Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law, (gas cools off when it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

    First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

    As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there are more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.

    With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

    This gives two possibilities:

    1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

    2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

    So which is it?

    If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa Morrison during my freshman year: "...that it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I still have not succeeded in having sexual relations with her, then #2 cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze.

    The student received the only "A" given.
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  • #2
    Re: hell

    That is just beautifully logical thinking! The personal touch (or not getting to touch) is the icing on the cake!
    Ron is the MAN!!!!

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: hell

      A+, genuis at work with humor.

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: hell

        this guy is a genius

        Comment


        • #5
          Re: hell

          in the bible heaven is described as many times hotter than the sun while hell is way below freezing

          and no i dont remember the passages...

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          • #6
            Re: hell

            [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] this guy has to be a genius. if i were the teacher, definitely A+.

            kevin

            and stick to the topic at hand, stsk! [img]images/icons/grin.gif[/img]
            the trend is dead r.i.p. dime

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: hell

              I remember reading that quite a while ago. It is still funny today. [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: hell

                Dude! That is funny as hell. I never thought of looking at it that way.

                Don

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                • #9
                  Re: hell

                  A++ I need someone ot work for me he is hired based on that
                  I keep the bible in a pool of blood
                  So that none of its lies can affect me

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                  • #10
                    Re: hell

                    [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] That guys rules! [img]graemlins/notworthy.gif[/img]
                    I feel my soul go cold... only the dead are smiling.

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                    • #11
                      Re: hell

                      Originally posted by stsk:
                      in the bible heaven is described as many times hotter than the sun while hell is way below freezing

                      and no i dont remember the passages...
                      <font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Actually Heaven would be brighter than the sun, and Hell would be darker than the dark side of the moon, however, Hell is hotter than the sun.

                      A+ for the student [img]graemlins/toast.gif[/img]

                      Newc
                      I want to depart this world the same way I arrived; screaming and covered in someone else's blood

                      The most human thing we can do is comfort the afflicted and afflict the comfortable.

                      My Blog: http://newcenstein.com

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                      • #12
                        Re: hell

                        Thats fricken awesome! Yeah, he'd get an A+ in my class! [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

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                        • #13
                          Re: hell

                          You guys are easily amused [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif[/img]

                          This is an OLD OLD Urban Legend. There is no student

                          http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/hell.asp
                          "Quiet, numbskulls, I'm broadcasting!" -Moe Howard, "Micro-Phonies" (1945)

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Re: hell

                            Mordor, shredder, toejam, Newc, wulfe
                            "Quiet, numbskulls, I'm broadcasting!" -Moe Howard, "Micro-Phonies" (1945)

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Re: hell

                              Originally posted by RacerX:
                              This is an OLD OLD Urban Legend. There is no student

                              http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/hell.asp
                              <font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Have you got ALL the Snopes urban legends memorized to trash the cool JCF threads with? [img]graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

                              Comment

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