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The scariest looking aircraft

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  • #31
    My personal favorite:



    Maybe not badass scary, but certainly one of the most awesome warplanes in the history of aviation. Very tight to move around in, very scary to fly in, and the just whole experience of knowing how many kids flew in these things makes the hair on your arms stand up!
    Last edited by Joelski; 06-15-2008, 09:09 AM.
    There is no "team" in "Fuck You!"

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    • #32
      Originally posted by nhspike View Post
      Check the add-on machine gun pods on that Stuka...
      Holy fuck.
      LOL
      No wonder he has such a full card.
      You could pretty much get that thing over enemy territory and just hold the go button while you fly in a circle and come home.
      Just imagine the things that would have bullet holes in them. hehe

      All very well and good, so long as there was some air cover for them. The Stuka was like a fat chick ambling away from a pie-shop burglary, very easy to catch and virtually defenceless. During the Battle of Britain the RAF bagged loads and loads of them as they ran home after dropping a relatively poor payload. In the latter stages of WW2, on the Eastern Front, being a Stuka pilot was pretty much a suicide mission, the Reds had Jabos that could pick them off without breaking a sweat.

      However, as a shock weapon, perfection. Total psychological breakdown of the enemy in the strike area, pant-shittingly scary. (I imagine!)
      And the blokes who flew them had balls of steel too. I wouldn't have wanted to put my faith in a primitive automatic air-brake system and let the plane dive by itself whilst I concentrated on aiming the bomb, but they did. I wonder how many splattered on the deck before they perfected the system?

      I'd love to see and hear a Stuka flying, a total war machine.

      Other scariest aircraft would be those fucking great big Zeppelins. Imagine seeing a few of them appear overhead and some squarehead dropping bombs out of the gondola onto your house.

      Also, US B29s. You are minding your own business, outside, a glint catches your eye and you notice way way high the vapour trails. Not long later you are homeless. As is the rest of your town. You didn't even hear the fucking planes! (although the sound of a single one taking off is awesome, the noise a few hundred of them made must have been bowel-moving)
      At the end of WW2 they were flattening hamlets and large farms in Germany, there was so little legit stuff to bomb and air supremacy was absolute!!

      Then the B52s and whatever the US used after that. I don't like these things simply because they were shiny! Watching the old 50s footage chills me because there's no attempt to camoflage or make them more drab. They are just bristling, must have intimidated interceptor pilots who would have had to attempt to take out planes so supremely confident in appearance.

      Finally, the good old Spitfire. Not very scary to me, in fact when I see and hear one, I get a hardon. Those Rolls Royce lumps are fucking superb, nothing sounds like one. But to Fritz in his lonely Stuka (or even when they got rear gunners), the appearance of some of these must have induced poo-filled jodphurs (even if the Hurricane was a more successful plane in terms of tallies and numbers. Again, the Spit wins on the psychological front)

      Oh, and I forgot. Fancy being a Kraut in 1944, ordered to drive down to HQ. Drive? You gotta be fucking kidding Herr Major, look up there, circling around - a "cab-rank" of unchallenged rocket-firing trigger happy Typhoons. Go get your own orders, I'm lying low. Very low!
      So I woke up,rolled over and who was lying next to me? Only Bonnie Langford!

      I nearly broke her back

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      • #33
        I've always found these to be rather imposing:



        Of course there's something about an aircraft specifically designed to leave one's nation as it is in the process of becoming a smoking radioactive wasteland, evade what little is left of the enemy's air defenses, and kill their survivors just as they're beginning to emerge from the rubble of the first strike that adds significantly to the 'cringe factor'.
        Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam!

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        • #34
          Looks reet scary too, that little red cross in a small white square. No, wait! The image didn't load!!!
          So I woke up,rolled over and who was lying next to me? Only Bonnie Langford!

          I nearly broke her back

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          • #35
            I always thought the Phantom was pretty bad-assed too...

            Here's another blurry pic, but I figured Bengal would dig it...


            Talk about getting you moneys worth... we were still using these in the first gulf war (wild weasel anti SAM type stuff).

            "Wow,... that was some of the hardest rockin ever. Hardest to listen too."
            --floydkramer

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            • #36


              There's not many as sinister-looking as this one, even though it was unarmed. The noise would mess you up pretty badly, I guess!

              Just think how mean the bird they've got as a replacement must look...

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              • #37
                Originally posted by Snoogans View Post


                There's not many as sinister-looking as this one, even though it was unarmed. The noise would mess you up pretty badly, I guess!

                Just think how mean the bird they've got as a replacement must look...


                that word sums it up!
                I wish my hair-color was EDS :/

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                • #38
                  There is an anime called Hellsing. In one of the episodes a vampire was flying a sr71. Now thats what i call scary.

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                  • #39


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                    • #40
                      Originally posted by destructin_od View Post
                      There is an anime called Hellsing. In one of the episodes a vampire was flying a sr71. Now thats what i call scary.

                      What was that? The two were called something boys. I don't remember the something part.
                      I wish my hair-color was EDS :/

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